A dear efriend–Ankur Mithal over at Dark Office Humour–posted a list of funny signs found around the area. I got a good laugh over them and then my muse pointed out they were a great opportunity for grammar lessons.

After all, we are grammaraticians, neologists, and writing experts. Who better than us to fix these signs in need of a comma, word rearrangement, or toss in the trash.

Read the list below and add a comment about how you would correct the errant grammar that led to the misunderstood message:

• In an office:
  TOILET OUT OF ORDER……. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
• In a Laundromat:
  AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
• In a London department store:
  BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
• In an office:
  WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
• In an office:
  AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
• Outside a second-hand shop:
  WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING – BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
• Notice in health food shop window:
  CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
• Spotted in a safari park:
  ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
• Seen during a conference:
  FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN’T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
• Notice in a farmer’s field:
  THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
• On a repair shop door:
  WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR – THE BELL DOESN’T WORK).

How many could you fix?

More on grammar:

Writer’s Tip #29: No Exclamation Points! Please!

Do You Make These Writing Blunders?

Writer’s Tip #23: The Use of ‘Lay’

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Jacqui Murray is the author of the popular Building a Midshipman, the story of her daughter’s journey from high school to United States Naval Academy. She is the author/editor of dozens of books on integrating tech into education, webmaster for six blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice book reviewer, a columnist for Examiner.com and TeachHUB, Editorial Review Board member for Journal for Computing Teachers, monthly contributor to Today’s Author and a freelance journalist on tech ed topics. You can find her book at her publisher’s website, Structured Learning.